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Taylor Swift: It’s My Concert & I’ll Bitch About Boys If I Want To by accordingtoalanna

We’ve all held grudges longer than necessary. I’ve fallen victim to that more times than I can possibly imagine. I’ve forgiven, but not forgotten; I’ve gotten mad and then even; I’ve killed them with kindness; I’ve even reverted to my belief of karma as my only hope for revenge. Eventually though, I get over it and move on. Taylor Swift, on the other hand, doesn’t. Instead, she builds an entire persona, or brand, if you will, around her grudges. She calls it ‘fearless,’ but I just call it bitter (with a hint of overkill).

Taylor Swift performed at Madison Square Garden on August 27, 2009 to a sold out crowd of 20,000. The concert was part of her ‘Fearless’ tour, which has been one of the most sought-after tours for females this summer — sort of like what Lillith Fair was in the 90s, except with more shaven armpits and cowboy boots with sparkly skirts.

Despite my lack of appreciation for Taylor Swift and her music, I attended her concert in support of my friend who is a huge fan (but I won’t judge her, since I like some really questionable things myself). And believe it or not, I found myself knowing more Swift songs than I’d like to admit (when I was actually able  tell them apart).

Taylor Swift definitely knows how to get girls riled up and cheer for the underdog, which in this case, are themselves. With a full back-up band and two back-up singers to boot, she sang her broken heart out for an hour and a half while reminding everyone every chance she could that boys do indeed suck.

In between each song, Taylor took a long deep breath – gazing out into the sea of estrogen – and told one of four poignant tales: the one where she was ignored by her High School crush, the one where she was cheated on by her boyfriend, the one where she burned his pictures (which I highly doubt she actually did; she probably just untagged him on Facebook), the one where he will get what he deserves, or – my favorite — the one where she still believes in fairy tales, but realizes that “prince charming isn’t as easy to find as [she] thought… and in real life, the bad guy is actually really, really cute.” (Oh, I see… Thanks for the heads up, girl.)

Ya know, it’s pretty ironic (and hard to believe) that she has been screwed over by so many guys in the past, considering she is only 19-years-old, takes pride in being wholesome and is a firm believer of fairy tales. But, at least all of this supposed heartbreak inspires her to write mediocre songs in hopes of empowering former sluts, current prudes and those who are still resentful about the one that got away… And because of Taylor Swift’s redundant rants and words of wisdom (I get it, it’s her gimmick), they now know better than to get involved with bad boys. (Or at least nice guys who happen to buy you a toaster for your birthday, as shown in “Crimes of Passion,” a sketch video that played during a set change depicting Taylor’s many male muses. It was an obvious joke, but I couldn’t help but roll my eyes.)

taylor-swift-msg Swift’s stage presence was very endearing and definitely better than I predicted, but it was still quite theatrical and contrived (not like I expected any different from such a huge production). She strutted her stuff, booty popped, head-banged, fluffed her hair, batted her eyes and paused in “awe” of the crowd at the most precise times during the show. “I will remember this night for as long as I live. I will never, ever, forget what you just did for me,” she said in sheer amazement as the crowd went bananas for almost two minutes (apparently 30 seconds longer than at most of her shows – wow, weren’t we the lucky ones). I have to say though, those two minutes were awesome to witness, even if they weren’t entirely authentic – I love attending concerts at Madison Square Garden for that very reason; seeing musicians get overwhelmed with emotion standing in such a historic stadium gives even me chills.

There were two outstanding moments of the show that I would go as far as to say were my favorites of the night. One was when Taylor went into the audience (all the way up to the second mezzanine, which at MSG, is pretty high) and performed a couple of songs from that section and then moved her way down to the floor (with four bodyguards surrounding her, prepared to tackle any single white female that got in their way). It made being in such a huge arena intimate and sincere (and also hooked the people in the nosebleeds up with a pretty good view).

My second favorite moment was at the very end of ‘Should’ve Said No’ when it began to “rain” on stage with Taylor underneath it — getting soaked and wet — as the water spelled out words like “No.” (see this video for the visual.) Funny, The Jonas Brothers also make it “rain” on stage at their concerts, except with hearts engraved in the water. I hope Taylor gets the memo and bitches about it at her next show. (Oh, those heartless bad boys!)

A memorable mention: The many costume changes — The show kicked off with Taylor and her crew dressed as a High School marching band and chearleaders ala the ‘You Belong With Me’ music video and later went back in time to the Rennessaince period ala ‘Love Story.’ Even on top of the extravagant costumes, Taylor’s personal wardrobe changed a good five or six times during the duration of the concert. I felt like I was watching Sarah Jessica Parker host MTVs Movie Awards circa 2000 all over again. (Don’t get the reference? My apologies, I’ll try to be more dated next time.)

My least favorite part of the show (besides the constant reminder from Taylor Swift that she will write a song about you if you so much as break up with her in a 27 second phone call, or just not like her back) was this bizarre pseudo-drum duel between her and the violinist during the encore. The drums were designed to look like stacked garbage cans, but were completely irrelevant to not only the song they were leading up to (‘Should’ve Said No’), but the entire theme of the show. To make matters worse, they weren’t even actually drumming! They each would bang once on the drums then dramatically fall to the floor or sway their heads in slow motion while creepy background music played. (Like oh-my-god, maybe the violinist was playing the chick that TayTay’s ex cheated on her with and the garbage drums were representing like—wait, no, you lost me at garbage drums.) The light scheme during this performance was blue accompanied by clouds on the screen, signifying only what I can assume is… I have absolutely no fucking idea! If they were trying to gain street-cred with this segment, they failed. Not even Oscar the Grouch would be amused. It left me absolutely perplexed, but perhaps someone can enlighten me on its significance… anyone… anyone? Bueller?

I do want to say that I was thoroughly entertained by the entire spectacle and liked the experience of seeing the number one selling artist of 2009 live in concert. My friend — who I went to the show with — said to me afterwards, “Where was Taylor Swift when I was growing up?” And that’s when it hit me; Swift is representing bubble-gum tween angst for the Z-generation… I can only just hope these girls graduate to Fiona Apple when their broken hearts and unhappily ever after fairy tales are all grown up. But for now, I guess they’ll just have to idolize a run-of-the-mill songstress whose entire shtick is to hold miniscule grudges for the sake of selling out places like Madison Square Garden.




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